Fireflies

It’s been a summer full of beautiful chaos. My husband coached our boys basketball team again and we had a house full of kids most weekends. At times it felt like summer was on fast forward, but we also had lazy days where I felt like we got to really enjoy our home and each other.

Spending so much time with kids this summer – ours and many others – brought highs and lows. Lows included poverty, addiction and absent parents. Highs included team bonding, volunteering, faith, and friendship. My heart hurt a lot of days, but I also got to witness God’s slow and steady work. Not just in our home, but also with some of the kids we’ve grown to know and love.

When I am fearful my default is still fix, manage and control. I wrestle with what ifs, struggle with worst case scenario and have been guilty of trying to wear a super hero cape at times. While I have believed in a higher power for quite some time, I am still young in my Christian journey. So it’s important to stay connected to others who encourage my spiritual growth and challenge me in the sticky spots. My friend Sara recently reminded me – I can be present and love each kiddo in the moment, and then trust God with the big picture. Oh yeah…trust God.

Last Monday night the drive home was just one of those drives. Back roads, sunset, and the moon rising up behind me. Country music cranked up, windows down and feeling tremendous gratitude. There were fireflies in the fields everywhere – lighting up the sides of the road – it was magical. I felt God’s grace and I felt peace in my heart. I said to myself – I see you God.

Below is a Bible verse my friend Cherry shared with me a couple weeks ago. I have it written on a sticky note on my mirror. It’s a beautiful reminder for this season of life.